Keratoconus x Work
Hey luvs!
I know I know! “ Where the eff have you been Shakeila?!” I owe you all an apology.
I promised more posts this year, but after dropping Keratoconus X Support a couple of months ago, I completely ghosted y’all. Life happened - let’s just say it took some unexpected turns. Just like Keratoconus (KC) can be unpredictable, life has its way of throwing us off course. There have been many twists and turns this year making it hard to find my way back.
So, with less than two months left in the year, I’m determined to make the most of it. I’m going to shine more light on KC topics and end the year strong.
The funny thing is, I had this post written ages ago, but I never got around to posting it. The craziest part? The delay fits perfectly with the theme of this post. Initially what I had written was… let’s say diplomatic. I sugarcoated a lot of the things when I just need to be blunt with you all. That’s the reason you’re here, right?! You want someone to keep it 100; give you nothing but the truth.
For years I thought I couldn’t do it all. I couldn’t work where I wanted to. I couldn’t do the things that I wanted to because of my eyes. So whatever job I got, I felt lucky to get it even if I was being mistreated. I ended up putting myself back into the box…yet again.
Before diving deep into Keratoconus and the relentless juggle with work, let me first answer the question I get asked quite often;
“Am I able to have a full-time job when I have Keratoconus?”
The answer is … Yes. No matter if it’s mild or advanced KC, you can work, and you can work long hours. Will it be easy? Not at all. The journey can be tough, but not so much on the physical side. Physically, it's about managing your time wisely - balancing things like the use of contact lenses to give your eyes enough oxygen and avoid further issues. There are always sacrifices, especially when you’ve chosen a demanding career path, as I did.
But the real challenge? It’s the mental aspect. That’s where the difficulty truly lies.
The daily dilemma of choosing between my precious eyesight and the demands of my job. A dilemma that tugs at my heartstrings and pushes me to ponder – Do I prioritize my eyes or my career?
I find myself grappling with this question time and again. I’m sometimes nudged by my loved ones to not put my health secondary. It’s not that I take my eye condition lightly; it's the dread of letting down my team that gets me every time. The struggle intensifies when Keratoconus is not just a hurdle but a frighteningly unpredictable one, and the only lens of clarity is a pair of scleral lenses.
Now, let me transport you through a rollercoaster of experiences spanning over a decade in the finance industry. My first job at a Big Five firm which deserves a standing ovation and applause – I was a young, apprehensive 22-year-old conquering uncertainties. The finance world is notorious for its demands, and my initial fear was whether they would accept someone like me, with Keratoconus, into the fold. So, I kept my condition under wraps, a secret.
Fast forward, the demanding nature of being an auditor clashed with my vision health. It was a tough call, but my eyesight took precedence. The moment of truth came when I revealed my struggle to one of the partners upon resigning. Instead of a cold farewell, she wished I had spoken up earlier, expressing a genuine desire to find a solution that accommodated my needs. This unexpected empathy left me touched, and it became a turning point in my approach towards transparency with my bosses.
However, not all tales end in compassion. No matter if they scream to the rooftop “ We aRe aN EqUaL oPpOrtUniTy CoMpaNy” - Bullshit! Some employers consider health issues mere inconveniences, undermining the gravity of rare conditions like Keratoconus or any other invisible diseases. I've faced bosses who understood, and others who dismissed my struggles, or worse; passing the glass doors, hearing them speak ill about how your health is poor and you’ll never make any further because health is wealth and i’m unwealthy.
The negative comments stung… They stung hard, even when I knew my truth. Struggling to prove my worth during moments of illness, I inadvertently pushed my eye health aside to avoid judgment. It took time to realize that not everyone comprehends rare diseases/ invisible diseases, and the misconception persists that a pair of glasses can fix any eye problem.
So, with everything I’ve learned over the years, to those of you who are navigating Keratoconus and the corporate labyrinth, here's a word of advice:
Don't Expect Universal Understanding: Sadly, not everyone will grasp the nuances of your condition.
Brush Off Office Gossip: Co-workers might not always be kind during emergencies. Some would take the opportunity to bring you down, just ignore it.
Prioritize Your Well-being: Your health is paramount; don't compromise it for a job. And don’t feel guilty for prioritizing yourself.
Choose Wisely: Opt for a job or career where your well-being is valued.
Be Transparent: You don't have to spill every detail, but honesty about your condition fosters understanding.
Cut Ties if Necessary: If your employer lacks compassion drop them, your mental and physical health is more crucial.
Dealing with terrible bosses is like having a bad doctor. A couple of years ago, I was fearless, a tad bit scared but confident in my worth. Then, as time went by, I slowly became fragile, full of doubt, and trapped myself in a job where I experienced sexual harassment, gender discrimination, and even bias against my health. It felt like being stuck in a toxic relationship, completely oblivious to the fact that I deserved better.
But everything changed when I met a remarkable man. He had lost 90% of his sight, and yet, he was the CEO of a successful company. We spoke for a few minutes and those few minutes did a number on me. Around the same time, I had loved ones remind me of who I was - a go-getter - a woman who never settles for less than what I deserve. Suddenly, the fog lifted, and I realized that the problem wasn’t me—it was that company. I knew I could do better, so I left.
I’m back on my journey to become that fearless woman I dreamt of being when I was a little girl. If I ever decided not to work, that would be because I choose to, not because of any doctor or any foolish boss. It’ll be on my terms. And deep down I know that there are still great leaders out there, similar to the ones I met at my first job. Leaders who appreciate you and understand that everyone has a different story and some stories are more complicated than other
Remember, with KC every minute - second counts so the hours we spend working for someone else are significant. Choose an employer who cares, one who sees beyond your condition, understanding that it doesn’t define who you are - it’s just a condition you have to live with.
In the grand scheme of life, losing sight due to pushing too hard for an unappreciative employer is a tragic tale waiting to unfold. Let’s not be the protagonists in that story. Your eyes, your health, your well-being – they deserve a spotlight brighter than any job can offer.
Until the next post! xoxo
